Spinal Radical-apathy: My Story with Chronic Pain
Yes — I’m calling it Spinal Radicalapathy. A spin on the medical diagnosis I’ve been given: spinal radiculopathy. But for me, it’s more than a clinical term. It’s pain with a side of teeth-grinding frustration, and a journey that has tested me mentally, physically, and emotionally.
If you’ve never heard of spinal radiculopathy, it basically means that a nerve root in your spine is pinched, causing pain, numbness, weakness, or tingling — often radiating through your limbs. According to HopkinsMedicine.org, it can occur in your cervical, thoracic, or lumbar spine. Sounds straightforward, right? But in my case, the cause isn’t clear. I’ve dealt with years of back pain and nerve issues with no exact explanation or fix.
The Weight of Pain — And Life
At the time of writing this (it’s 2022, and I’m 31), I’m not just someone battling chronic pain — I’m a father and even a grandparent. And to be honest, I’ve struggled with feeling like I’ve really been there for my kids. Now that my oldest have kids of their own, that feeling weighs even heavier.
Like many of us, I went through a whirlwind during the COVID pandemic. Strangely enough, I actually lost weight during that time — down from my heaviest point of 240 lbs in June 2021. The shift wasn’t just in food habits; it was a mindset change. But the stress, fear, and mental toll from the news, isolation, and constant worry left scars too. Panic attacks became a part of daily life.
I barely remember the second half of 2021. It’s a blur. My wife and I were both considered “essential workers.” I work in lending, and she runs a restaurant — both of us managing people, managing stress, and showing up for work in a world that felt like it was on fire. Between masks, shields, constant sanitizing, and social distancing, anxiety became the norm.
To add to the pile, my wife was finally diagnosed with celiac disease and IBS, which at least gave us answers, but added another layer of adjustment. Her new diet helped both of us lose weight — but even as my body changed, the pain didn’t let up.
Searching for Relief
In 2022, I decided to revisit treatment for the nerve pain running through my legs and hips. Over the years, I’ve tried:
Acupuncture Physical therapy — somewhat helpful, but painful at times TENS units — nerve stimulators that give temporary relief Chiropractic care — which felt underwhelming and overpriced
Some stretches still help a bit, but most days, it’s pain with flashes of minor relief.
Now, in 2023, I’ve started using braces: a back brace, knee braces, and even special sciatic supports. They help me stay upright and walk with a bit more comfort, but they’re not magic. The pain’s still there, just dulled.
A New Approach to Pain Management
Recently, my pain specialist suggested trying a new form of medication — a custom-compounded prescription at a specialized pharmacy. These pharmacies tailor medications in different formats and doses depending on your needs, from pills to creams or injections.
I just picked up my prescription today. It’s a microdose version of a stronger medication, designed to gradually help manage the pain over 2–3 months. It’s supposed to be taken in the morning, but I’m tempted to start it now. The only warning? Possible nightmares if taken at night. So, we’ll see how the first night goes.
Why I’m Sharing This
This is just one chapter of my story — not a medical guide, just one man’s experience living with invisible pain. Chronic pain is complicated. It impacts your health, your emotions, your relationships, your identity.
And if you’re reading this and dealing with something similar: you’re not alone.
Thanks for being here. More to come.
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