Original Orient Adventures

Now I don’t know how many of you have pain but chronic pain is on so many levels and depends where it is originated. Now i am in the process of living with chronic pain from my lower back. Back pain to some is on a even higher level of pain and when it becomes chronic pain it is even worse. I hear a lot of people complain about pulling a muscle in their back or they have a twinge / twist our slight ache in their back. Im just off to the side like welcome to my world but they only feel it for a days. While i just feel the pain all the time all at different times of day or days and at different levels of pain.
Now i can fall asleep most nights but their are times when the pain is just their and consistent all in different forms from aches in low back to sharp stabbing and or tight pinching in my back to my legs.
Their is times i can sleep and their are days i do not have a severe pain. These days are few but their is days very few that i would say my pain level is a low level like a 4 i guess. These days are the days i still take it easy since i do not know how long i am going to be in so little pain. Now if i do not take it easy since i am feeling good and i would rather get things done i just might keep up the moment and pray i do not feel horrible the next day or the next few days or longer their really is no telling.
The worst part is the amount of work does not really matter their has been days were i would do some yard work and felt like i was hit by a bus and in pain and haveing a hard time walking for a week or so. The best part is i also have done nothing but relax with my family and same thing felt like a truck hit me. Their have also been times i have did some labor intensive work and felt good the next day. Chronic pain and or chronic back pain is almost like playing Russian roulette. Russian Roulette is and old bravery and stupidity game of chance take a six shooter place a bullet in and spin the mag then place the gun to your head and squeeze the trigger and pray the bullet is not in the chamber, if it is lets say you just met your maker. That is how i feel chronic pain can be.
Now theory about chronic pain has been from mental to emotional physical pain. I do not know what to consider it my self as i feel emotional when I can’t do things and or can’t play with my kids/ Grandchildren, physically when i can not walk or run at all and their are some people that think im just trying to get sympathy. Huh yeah like i like being dependent to carry groceries in and or even walking when im at my worse.
I struggle all the time with things like should i tell the people how bad i am around me or just try and struggle? This is the hard part since some people believe their is no way i could be in pain randomly some days or hours in the day and not always in sever pain. I have days that are good like everyone else, I question most days, I am in a constant guard to be in pain. Classes are not the same as you think, these Kaiser pain management classes only teach you how to cope with and live with the pain like deep breathing or box breathing these are all great techniques to lower heart rate and possible lower the pain level as anxiety can make pain worse.
The thing with the human body is like a maze mixed with a puzzle, their are times you may think you have taken the right turn and found the puzzle peice that fits just to run in to a obsticale or the peice is not fitting perfectly. Now maybe for some the peice that barely fits might be good enough but i have always been active. As a kid I would be the one climbing trees and jumping on roofs just because and now not being aable to walk some days is just not the thing for me. I love doing my best and getting alot done and being depended on so haveing to depend on others and not being able to tire myself out is like a sqeeky wheel for me it is the gear that just cant shift up and stuck.
Sleeping is the way the body and mind rest and process the day they had expereinced and reset for the next day. with out sleep your mind cant process emotional and intelectual things that happened and starts to creats a blockage and or an anxiety build up of the information that needs to be processed. Physically lack of sleep is draining body doesnt get enough sleep to reset certian functions might get harder thru the week and more strain gets put on the inner functions of muscles and or bones depending on the tasks completed.
To be in pain is a real obsticall and to not get sleep and or wakee up from sleep is a real pain as the body doesnt reapir it self and the equallibrium of the mind and body get mest up and then the next day is harder and maybe more pain this is just me ranting but what do you think?